google-site-verification: google3e86442cbf47c0e9.html Life,Love and Marriage: August 2010

Monday, August 30, 2010

10 Simple Things Men Want

10 Simple Things Men Want


It's tempting to assume men only want two things: steak and sex.


Entire days are devoted to perpetuating these kinds of cliches, yet they are humorous for men because we're amused that women assume this false notion is all we want. We're quite complicated creatures, and although probably not as baffling as any space alien from a Candace Bushnell column, men have secret wish lists of emotional needs that you may or may not be meeting.


Yet we are almost simplistic in our desires—so simple, in fact, that few women ever notice the fine line between our usual stoic persona and a deep funk brought on by a lack of reciprocated interest. Tom Miller from YourTango's TomFoolery rattled off one list of basic emotional pleasures: "A good night's sleep; a one-time-only get-out-of-trouble BS pass; an occasional never-again-mentioned bender; and one friend who we like but who you might consider a 'bad influence.'" But even more than that, we want some of the things you want (10 Simple Things Women Want); here are ten examples that you may find are close to your own emotional needs.


1. A moratorium on drama. We give you the occasional free pass to freak out about something that seems rather trivial upon next-day, post-caffeine retrospect. This does not mean a free pass to cause a scene in front of our friends or family.


2. Sexy sex. It's not enough to keep our sex lives consistent—both partners have to keep it consistently sexy. If you're not into it, we can pretend not to notice for a few times, but after that, it'll eat away at us and we won't have the guts to ask you what's wrong. Yet. The best thing you can do isn't porn star-inspired or the over-the-top-"yes, yes, yes"-ing; we'll detect that fakery, too. The trick is that, however you do it, you let us know that you really like doing it to us.


3. Romance. Crazy, right? What guy would scoff at you for bringing him a present, a token of affection once in a while, or cooking him a steak and then instead of telling him what you're going to do to him later, you tell him that he's amazing and sweet. Hell, I'm getting a tear in my eye just writing that.


4. Truth. The reason many guys have control-freak issues is because they have a sixth sense about being lied to. (Another reason they have control freak issues is that they're control freaks; learn to spot these guys in advance and avoid like an Ebola outbreak.) Next time your man says, "Who were you with?" give him the excruciating play-by-play, who was there, what the latest gossip on Cindy's crazy ex-husband, which bars you went to, everything except the bathroom breaks. This way, not only does he feel completely assured, he'll never pester you again about what you did.


5. Silence. "Some of us aren't as loquacious as our lady friends might like," admits Tom. "Generally it has nothing to do with you and we're not up for talking about it."


6. Dinner. One of the reasons you were thrilled to venture into a relationship with us is that we were completely willing to subvert the master-and-servant relationship paradigm. In other words, you don't have to cook for us every night. Nor do you have to pretend to like our bow-tie pasta with Ragu specialty—but a middle ground where you occasionally whip us up our favorite bolognese after an incredibly trying day is like the reverse of us taking you shoe shopping.


7. A sense of humor. Every guy in America has this phrase on his personals profile under the "What I'm looking for" category. Should you dismiss it because, well, you thought The Hangover is funny? No, because what "A sense of humor" really translates to is "Are you relaxed, in the moment, and bantering with me?" If the answer is "often not," we're going to think you're distracted and probably wondering how to extricate yourself from this tedious relationship.


8. A listener. We hear you when you say that men don't open up unless their compadres Jack Daniel's and Jim Beam help them out. When you sense we have just received some upsetting news (which could be everything from a humiliating day at work to Lebron James signing with the Cavs), make it clear you'll listen, but then drop it immediately. We'll come to you with the answers when we're ready to deal with bringing it all up again, which may be never if it turned out to be no biggie.


9. Matrimony. It may not necessarily be the matrimony of your girlhood dreams, but we do want to form a more perfect union with you—permanently. We may be hesitating because we worry that we're making the right choice, that we are meant to be together forever, rather than just proposing to you because we've been together for a couple of years. Maybe we need more time to settle in, but it's not because we are still thinking about other women. We care about you, and that's why we're carefully weighing this decision.


10. An end to game-playing. This is a sort of bookend to the moratorium on drama. Everything thinks it's cute to toy with the boys when you're starting out, calling them back days later and seeming disinterested. In the end, this only has two possible outcomes—we will be put off by your lack of interest and go with a stronger choice or we will pursue you for so long you'll assume we're in a relationship, except we're still figuring out whether all that bird-dogging was worth catching the chick.




Friday, August 27, 2010

Youngest Moms in the History

(age 5, Linda Medina)

Linda Medina was the youngest girl ever to give birth. She was just 5 years, 7 months, and 21 days when her 2.7 kg (6.0 lb) son Gerardo was born. Linda got attendance of her parents when they noticed abnormal increase of her belly; she was thought to have had a tumor but when Linda was taken to hospital, there they get to know about her pregnancy. The mystery remains unsolved about the father of Gerardo. Both mother and son died in the age of 40 and 76 respectively

(age 9, Hilda Trujillo)


In November Hilda Trujillo entered the Maternity Hospital as the patient of Obstetrician Rolando Colareta, underwent examination by a team of 16 obstetricians, gland specialists, radiologists, psychiatrists and general practitioners. They reported her to be normal, only a little older-looking than other girls of her age. After one month on December 1957 she gave birth to a baby girl. Her 22 year old cousin was arrested accusing rape. Dr Rolando Colareta who examine her give reasoning saying “the rape of minors is nothing so unusual here or anywhere else. But of course rape does not mean pregnancy in children so young except in rare cases”.

(age 9, Phetchabun.Thailand)


Not that long ago in the month of February 2001 Wanwisa Janmuk became youngest Asian mother. World’s forth youngest mother was married to a 26 year old man; by the time of birth mother and father were nine and twenty seven year old respectively.

(age 9, Singapore)


After Thailand, Singapore was second Asian country where a nine year old girl gave birth to a baby. She was student of primary school, had an affair with 14 year old student. Both were alone at home in the absence of their parents and she ended up getting pregnant.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Life after marriage - The Commitment Phobia

In most cases, we tend to believe that men suffer from commitment phobia, but of late, women are being caught with this type of phobia. Relationships had never been so complicated like they are today. People get into relationships, but these relationships fail to achieve what they are meant to achieve. This happens because today’s generations do have commitment issues. As they, especially women are getting confident with their careers and comfortable with the new-found financial independence, they are losing grip on their very personal issues. So, what commitment phobia is all about and why does it sprout?

If we are to define commitment phobia, then it is the fear of getting involved or committed to anything. However, this phobia is often associated with relationships. It is that phobia that affects people at their personal level. The sufferers of this phobia are often concerned with their careers and other future perspectives. You may have acquainted some people or there may be friends around who say that they do not prefer a long-term relationship, while still they are into a relationship. Many of these people might be suffering from commitment phobia. But, you cannot say that they are not in a serious relationship. Of course, they are genuine and serious, but something holds them back when it comes to take their relationship to the next level.

Commitment phobia is often responsible for some of the unlikely decisions that some couples land in. Ever knew some people who have been very genuine with their relationships, but eventually had to part ways? They can be the ones who were hit by this phobia in different stages of their relationships. And this, obviously, is not a nice thing to observe. You might be wondering when two persons love each other and can be happy together, why they cannot be together for the rest of their lives? A big question, indeed!

So, why people suffer from commitment phobia? Well, disturbed childhood memories, involving parental issues can have a great impact on children. As they grow up, these unhealthy memories can even have deeper impact on their lives and this creates unwillingness in getting committed into a relationship.

Some people also refrain from being committed because they do not want to revisit their past (where they were being rejected or have had troubled relationships). They make conscious efforts not to face similar situations in their new relationships. So, they find themselves safer and happier not being committed! There can be other reasons that make people apprehensive of getting involved in a committed relationship.

This phobia can often be treated by the sufferers themselves, however, depending on the level of suffering, people can also seek professional help! No matter how one treats commitment phobia, the important thing is that it should be discarded from one’s mind if he/she does not want a genuine relationship to suffer!

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Happy Married Life





A happy married life is as essential for fulfillment as food is for hunger.

It is very important to leave your all perils and suffocation to office when you entered in your home because sometimes it can effect your married life so badly.

1. Respect each other's views at all times. So say often something like "I agree." or "That's right!"


* Give particular attention to what the spouse wants, believes and likes and say:

o "I'm sorry that I disappointed you." and
o "I'll try to make up for that." if you may have given rise to a disagreement.

2. Listen to each other properly.

* Show consideration to your spouse, with high regard to not disagreeing unnecessarily.


3. Give priority to your spouse over everything else in your life.

* Show your esteem for your spouse by giving preference over the needs and wishes of others when possible.


4. Sincerely say "I love you" at least once a day to each other.

5. Start your day with a warm kiss.

6. Take time out and spend a few moments together--just the two of you alone. Maybe you and your spouse can go out for a walk or a drive to get away from others.

7. Talk graciously to each other about your thoughts--especially things for the two of you to agree upon or do together. Doing this daily helps foster communication between partners.

* Talk and thus be open hearted; this can create a bridge of thoughts and understanding.
* Never say things in anger intentionally meaning to hurt your partner. Verbal hurts are hard to erase and can cause lasting damage to your relationship.
* when arguing keep to the subject and try not to personally attack your partner


8. Cook for each other, and show that you appreciate the thoughtfulness and the food; even if you could do better, or maybe you will end up doing it all.

9. Remember that ideally and spiritually both of you are like one soul and two bodies, so don't ever hurt each other or you hurt yourself as well.

10. Don't forget to do the little things that make each of you smile and feel loved.

11. Be patient with each other as much as possible.

12. Don’t break martial confidences or use them as a weapon during an argument.

13. If you sense that something is wrong with your partner take time to embrace them and ask what's the matter, may be that's the time they need your attention the most. Don't ignore that opportunity.

14. Make sure your partner knows how much you appreciate the little every day things they do, like doing the washing up or making the bed.

15. Surprise each other with little gifts or tokens of appreciation. This will make the moment even more special. Gifts need not be extravagant or painfully expensive. It is always the thought that counts. A little something to create warmth and sweet memories.